How to manage a happy marriage？ Respondents believe that mutual respect and tolerance are the most important.

　　Compared with their parents, this generation of young people pay more attention to the spiritual "right match" in marriage and love. They don’t want to make do in their marriage and expect a higher quality marriage life. What influence has the change of young people’s marriage attitude had? How to obtain and maintain a happy marriage?

　　Last week, a survey of 1,764 young people was conducted by the Social Investigation Center of China Youth Newspaper. According to the survey, 56.5% of the young people surveyed thought that the change of young people’s marriage attitude would help them to establish an independent marriage concept, while 45.9% of the young people surveyed thought that their sense of family responsibility would be weakened. For a happy marriage, the young people interviewed believe that both sides should respect and tolerate each other, have income and have their own social circles.

　　"Social governance, social order and mental outlook are related to the family."

　　Wu Bo, a 25-year-old graduate student of China Renmin University, has a harmonious relationship with his girlfriend, but he doesn’t expect marriage for economic reasons. He believes that this generation of young people are more independent, have their own principles and are more inclined to live for themselves.

　　"In the past, in the marriage of my parents, in many cases, I was looking for someone to build a small family and live together. Nowadays, more and more young people don’t need to worry about their livelihood, and their lives are rich and diverse, so they have higher requirements for marriage. " Guo Huiling (a pseudonym), a 23-year-old graduate student of China Renmin University, believes that young people have a healthy view of marriage, and if they really get married based on this view of marriage, their quality of life after marriage will be higher.

　　Zhou Xiaopeng, a senior national psychological counselor, analyzed that young people are getting married later than before, which is also related to people’s life extension. In her opinion, there is nothing wrong. Moreover, when a person can choose the most suitable marriage in a mature and rational situation, it can bring more sense of stability to marriage and is also conducive to social stability and harmony.

　　In the survey, 56.5% of the young people surveyed believe that the change of young people’s marriage attitude will help them establish an independent marriage concept, and 42.7% of the young people surveyed believe that this will improve the quality of marriage.

　　Tu Lili, 27, from Foshan, Guangdong, recently broke up with her boyfriend because of emotional disagreement. Many young people around her have a negative attitude towards marriage. "I think this may reduce the fertility rate in the future, especially in the first-tier cities. Now the cost of raising children is too high. It is not easy to have children, and it is even more difficult to raise children. I haven’t the courage to pay unconditionally for a child. "

　　Wu Bo feels that young people’s attitude towards marriage will lead to the phenomenon of late marriage and late childbearing. "And parents’ urging and forcing marriage will also increase family conflicts, and the conflict between the two generations is not conducive to family harmony."

　　Liao Ying (a pseudonym), a 26-year-old teacher of a training school in Chengdu, is married and has children, and has a harmonious relationship with her husband. In her view, the reluctance of young people to get married may lead to more elderly people living alone in society than now, which will aggravate the aging of society.

　　Wang Xiaoyan (pseudonym), a 27-year-old from Tangshan, Hebei Province, is about to get married with her lover. She believes that getting married in a hurry is a more independent performance. But at the same time, she believes that the emotional support given by family is irreplaceable.

　　In the survey, 55.6% of the young people interviewed are also worried that young people’s views on marriage will lead to more late marriage and late childbirth, which will aggravate the problem of social aging; 45.9% of the young people interviewed are worried that young people’s sense of family responsibility will weaken.

　　Zhang Baoyi, director of the Institute of Sociology of Tianjin Academy of Social Sciences, said that the whole social governance, social order and mental outlook are related to the family. In addition, the country’s pension problem and unemployment rate are all related to the family. The family plays the role of social regulator. When the family is harmonious, it will reduce the outbreak of social contradictions and make the society more stable. "The reduction of the marriage rate will have a great impact on employment, the upbringing of the next generation, pension, population policy, medical and health care, public services and so on. For example, supporting the elderly, now the family bears a heavier responsibility for supporting the elderly. "

　　How to maintain a happy marriage, 59.9% of the young people interviewed believe that both sides should respect and tolerate each other.

　　Liao Ying believes that marriage life is all rice, oil, salt, sauce, vinegar and tea, and it is not as sweet and beautiful as it used to be in love. Both husband and wife should have enough sense of responsibility, put themselves in other’s shoes, consider problems from each other’s standpoint, tolerate each other, care about each other, and treat each other as relatives. At the same time, both sides should lead an honest and clean life, work together to make progress and support each other, instead of one party completely relying on the other.

　　Wang Xiaoyan believes that in marriage, two people should always be honest with each other and not cheat. "Two people are always stumbling together, which requires mutual understanding, not too self-centered, too selfish, and not quarreling, breaking up, or divorcing without a word. Everything should be considered from the overall situation. "

　　For a happy marriage, the young people interviewed believe that the most important thing is to respect and tolerate each other (59.9%), all have income (54.1%) and have their own social circles (48.9%).

　　Zhang Baoyi analysis, compared with the past, young people are willing to pay less, more inclined to care about themselves, and lack the sense of responsibility to safeguard their families. After establishing a family in this way, the vitality of the family is getting lower and lower, and the attraction between husband and wife is reduced. This is where young people need to make up lessons. "Marriage is actually a very simple matter, that is, caring and caring for each other, making each other feel warm and making each other feel like staying at home if they don’t want to go anywhere, instead of just being satisfied with self-improvement. To be able to do this, we first need to have this awareness. "

　　Among the young people interviewed, 48.1% were men and 51.9% were women. 30.8% live in first-tier cities, 47.3% in second-tier cities, 19.3% in third-and fourth-tier cities, 2.3% in county towns, and 0.3% in villages and towns. (China Youth Daily China Youth Network reporter Du Yuanchun intern Chen Qianpan)